All of these stories have to do with my weight gain and weight loss journey I promise....

So I got married........I'm going to be SO honest here.  Some of you will be surprised but most of you will not.  I am just tired of holding it all in.  Maybe this blog will help someone other than me....Maybe.  So while me and my husband were dating.  You know the WHOLE 4 months!  We didn't know each other very well at all but we felt like we were in love.  We had MAJOR chemistry and were very attracted to each other.  We rushed getting married.  Who knows, if we would have dated longer honestly we would most likely have never got married.  We argued A LOT over EVERYTHING!  I'm not joking!  We would fight over if that was a black cat or a white cat that ran across the street!  We argued over everything!  We are both very stubborn people.  Not a good combination at all!   But we were in love right?

 In my church (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints) We believe in getting married before we live with a boyfriend or fiance.  We believe you should not have sex before marriage.  So needless to say.....10 years later I can say we rushed it.  My mom recalls asking me, Are you sure?  Are you really sure?  It's not to late to call it off.  We just argued so much that people were questioning our decision.  I think even we questioned our decision but we loved each other and I had not felt the way I felt about him with anyone before.  I did date a handful of guys before him.  This time felt good, this time felt right.  He loved me.  He put all the effort into our relationship that I had not had before.  He was a great guy!  He was so many things on my list!  He was a member of my church, he was a returned missionary, he was a hard worker, he loved kids, He wanted children, he loved his Mom.  He was a catch!  We were in love and we were doing what we felt right. 

Well, within 3 months of being married, trials started.  Things were already hard.  We still argued A LOT,  He was not having much luck with finding a job he loved, I was hating my job and was laid off.  We were starting to already see things we were going to have to work on together.  I was starting to feel like he wasn't the same person I thought I married.  I'm sure he started to see things about me that he didn't like or was going to have to learn to deal with.  He disappointed me.  I'm sure I disappointed him too.  We came across a trial I wasn't quite sure how to deal with.  But we plugged along.  This trial really effected me.  I let it really effect me.  It was at this point I feel like I started to gain weight and to loose my self esteem that I thought I had.  I'm sure the weight gain was mostly because I stopped taking my weight loss herbs but a mix of the two things I'm sure effected me.  I remember feeling like I needed a bigger pair of pants within our first month or two of marriage.  I clearly remember feeling bigger and like I already looked bigger to my family and friends that I didn't see very much. 

Around our 3 month anniversary we decided that since I was laid off and he wasn't loving the job he had found, we would move back to his home state of California.  Maybe there he would have more luck with work.  I was up for the adventure.  This would be move number 1 of the 9 moves we would make in our 10 years of marriage!!!  Another thing that I'm sure played a roll in my weight gain. 

We moved to California and lived with his Mom.  She also had her other son and his wife living there and I thought this would be so much fun!  We were young and in love.  We could do anything.  Well we only lived there for six months.  During that time I found a job I hated.....He was doing odd and end things for his mom and people she knew.  He did some remodeling work, handy man type stuff.  But this job was not going to last forever and he wasn't looking for work.  We lived like we were on a 6 month vacation.  We had fun!  We took in the sites, went on some mini vacations, saw lots of movies and ate at lots of yummy places! Eating was our fun!   There are some really yummy places to eat in Southern California!  We just hung out.  it was a good 6 months of getting to know each other and being able to just hang out.  We swam everyday, we had a good time but this just wasn't going to work out long term.  At least I didn't want to try anymore.  So we packed up and moved back to Utah!